Children of the Alley

Naguib Mahfouz (of Egypt) is one of my favorite authors, mainly, I think, for his intergenerational approach to storytelling. I am currently finishing his Children of the Alley in which he traverses something like 10 generations as he retells the story of humanity from a decidedly Egyptian local perspective. Michener and Uris do some of the same in their works.

I am keenly aware of the importance of raising godly children and the fact that each of these generations leaves only their children and their children’s values behind them, and these intergenerational stories subtly emphasize this point no matter who writes them.

My wife and I have no children of our own nor can we have any of our own. Before I get 100 responses telling me to wear boxers and telling us to relax, I should explain. First, our “complications” are not that simple. Second, we chose long ago (we knew this well before we married) to accept whatever hand we were dealt in life trusting that God had a design for our life. We chose to submit rather than spend all of our time, emotions, and passions fighting for what we want. I’m not saying that those who choose otherwise are wrong just that this is what we’ve chosen.

It could be that this is why I’m a pastor and Jennifer is a kindergarten teacher. Jennifer treats her students as her own children. I think part of the reason is that she doesn’t have the stress of going home to take care of her own kids after school. We are also very free to follow where ever the Lord leads. I don’t have to worry about even leaving an inheritance. We could move across the country tomorrow upon the Lord’s command with little implication.

I should note that there is D’Montiz. He lives with his great-grandma, and has been “hanging out” with us for about a year and a half. He says we treat him like a son, and sometimes I feel like that. Sometimes I wonder what I’m leaving in him for the future. It is also painful to be that close to a 10 year old, but not be able to actually call him your son. You always have to be ready for him to be gone from your life.

In closing, there are two tendencies that being childless create. First, I tend to despise the taking of children for granted and not spend time with them or especially putting them in daycare. Second, I tend to be very sensitive to how children are raised, what they are taught and how they are disciplined. I look at families, and think about how different I would feel if I were in their situation. It is the lack of the child that shows just how much more important the children are.

The truth is that if I had children, I’d probably be much more casual about this topic, but all I can do is know and understand that I haven’t walked in the shoes of the parent.